I want to set a couple goals. I'd like to do something DAILY that is out of my comfort zone. I want to be more social and outgoing when I'm out and about. I want to pay attention to others instead of just focusing on what I need to get done. I'm generally a pretty social person. But what you don't use you lose! Being a mom of 4 small children makes it easy to just stay home and work on the millions of things on my "to do" list.
Many of us, including myself, have gotten so comfortable communicating through a key board and we've become a little socially awkward. Don't get me wrong, I love Facebook and Instagram. But lets keep the real life communication alive. Let's type less and TALK more! Let's get social, NOT on social media. So I want to get out more. Get back to my high school roots. I was a social butterfly back then and my mom could NOT keep me home. I always wanted to be out among people.
Reasons why I feel it is important to be social:
#1. We NEED people. We all have the deep desire within us to have relationships, connect with others, to love and to be loved.
#2. People need YOU!!! God has made us all unique with different gifts and talents that were meant to be shared. Maybe your gift is the gift of compassion, or understanding. Or maybe you're a good listener. Maybe you have a story that other people need to hear. Perhaps what you say or do is an answer to someone's prayer. I believe that most answers to prayers come through another individual. So how can we BE an answer to someone's prayer if we are never around?
#3. It gives us PURPOSE. For the two reasons above, being social gives us purpose. We can wake up each day with the attitude, "who can I serve today?" Sharing a piece of ourselves with others is the way to true joy and fulfillment in life.
A few weeks ago I learned of this amazing new platform called Periscope. It's a way to share messages via live video streaming. Another thing I'm not so comfortable with, is speaking in front of people. We all know that things get easier with repetition. So I feel like doing a Periscope video each day will help me overcome that fear, and to share the messages in my heart. It's much easier to NOT blog and periscope, but that is not going to help me grow. Also, I will be missing out on the opportunity to share my story and gifts with others.
Ultimately my goal is to become the best version of me. And that won't happen if I'm not pushing myself to do uncomfortable things.
So I want to challenge everyone to do this with me. This isn't about ME, it's about US. Lets do something uncomfortable every day!
I'd love to watch YOUR videos on Periscope, so please let me know if you are doing videos of your own so that I can be sure to follow you. This way I will be notified when you are live.
So much to do and so little time. How is it possible to fit everything we need to do into one day?
It's not possible, because a women's work is NEVER done! All we can do is work smart and be happy with what we ARE able to do.
Although our "to do" lists are never ending, we must keep our priorities straight. This is something we will constantly need to evaluate (see video at the end of this post). It's so easy to get caught up in less important things. That's why I believe we need to be praying constantly that our priorities and goals are inline with God's will.
People are constantly asking me how I have the time to do what I do. This is a question us moms are ALWAYS asking each other, right? For some reason we tend to think other moms are doing it better, or doing more than we are. First of all, lets STOP comparing ourselves. I know this is hard. I'm constantly doing it myself. We need to just focus on doing OUR best, and that should be enough.
Today I'm going to share some tips as well as reveal to you that I am NOT super women. I'm just like you. I try, I fail, I get tired and overwhelmed. My house is not always clean, kids are not always bathed, and homework is not always done. I sometimes yell and get mean which is a sign I MAY be obsessing a little too much on keeping the house clean, or getting carried away doing a project and have no tolerance for interruptions, which is impossible when you have kids. So just know, that I too struggle.
Now let's get down to business. These tips are a compilation of my own as well as my lovely Facebook and Instagram friends who commented on my post last week. Thank you all for your awesome tips! They were so helpful for me.
#1 TURN OFF THE TV
"Stop watching TV. Sometimes we still have the TV on at night, but I don't actually watch it. I snuggle with my kids and work on my phone if they are watching something. I started building my side businesses and have continued running 3 side companies during the time most people watch TV. I don't miss TV at all and I get a great return from those few hours a week." -Abbey Karel
This is a great tip! I don't usually watch TV, but at night Sean and I do like to watch about 30 minutes together to help us unwind from the day. I know for some, the TV gets you wired, but for Sean and I it helps us turn our brains off. You know what they say, "watching TV will turn your brain to mush", haha.
#2 HAVE KIDS HELP "I always have my kids
help with daily chores. Moms think they have to do everything. They
don't. My kids are amazing with helping. My youngest who is 8, folds 1
load of laundry and puts away on everyone's
beds, this is daily. That way my laundry does not stack up. It is done
fresh out of the dryer. Only takes him about 15 min.
We
also eat on paper plates at dinner, clean up is quick and easy. And
done before I know it. My oldest helps me sweep and mop the house.
Usually once a week. Right now I am currently dusting. With my kids
helping me with light chores I am able to workout at night once they go
to bed, and this gives me more time to relax with them when they get
home from school. I mix veggies a lot of times to make it one side that
is cooked and then the main course. It saves on dirtying dishes. My oldest prepares all trash and takes to the road the night before of trash day. Usually, right before his shower time. My
kids both make their own lunches. They are allowed one sweet snack,
then fruit and cheese. This lets them choose what they want. They both
put them in the fridges along with their ice packs.
We
live in the country so my youngest rides the bus oldest drives. Every
morning I make the cereal, it is ready for them when they are ready. I
don't pour milk till they sit down. Every night they make sure their
room is neat and lay out their clothes. It keeps from a hassle of a
messy bedroom. FYI - my kids got smart! Their beds are made at all
times! The sleep on their made beds with a blanket, lol! I just can't do
that, but that's how they roll!" -Oliver Kelsey
"It
took me a couple of years to realize that my kids are capable of
helping out around the house. I used to do it all and I was burned out! I
can't tell you how teaching my kids to empty the dishwasher or keep
their rooms clean will free up my day. They are much more capable than I
gave them credit for!" -Adrienne O'Brien
"Starting
when my kids were young and teaching them to be self-sufficient has
been one of my greatest time-savers and one of my greatest joys. I
always kept them with me when they were little, and they had fun helping
me with cooking, gardening and other
chores. When they were older and the tasks didn't seem as fun anymore,
they still did chores using a chore chart system. One of their "chores"
was to look for something that needed to be done and do it. When their
chores were finished they had to ask, "Is there anything else you'd like
me to do?" Now that they are all in high school, they have completely
internalized what they learned when they were young. I love walking into
the kitchen and seeing them cleaning up without being asked. Or seeing
them do their own laundry without me telling them to. Often times, Marc
and I will come home from a business trip, and the house will look like
we never left. Not only have we taught them how to cook, clean and sew,
but we've taught them how to do Quickbooks, spreadsheets for our taxes
and other office work. They are all extremely bright and talented... and
self-sufficient. AND ready for the real world. All that to say... it's
completely worth it to spend time with your kids and teach them! So
rewarding in every way." -Jeannie Schulman #3 CLEAN EATING
This is definitely one of THE most important tips! Having the ENERGY to move fast and be productive is key. Mental Clarity and being able to focus definitely contributes to the amount of things you are able to check off your list. You all know how passionate I am about health and nutrition, it's become my mission in life. I want to educate people on the importance of what goes into our bodies. Please email me if you are interested in learning more about what I do to maintain a healthy lifestyle. You can also comment on this post and I will be sure to get back to you.
"I
think eating well (clean, energizing foods) are also key in making sure
we have enough fuel and energy to navigate through our days. Eating
junk adds stress and burnout!" -Jennifer Glydon #4 MEAL PREP Always make double or triple when ever making meals, then freeze the rest for another night later in the month.
It's the best feeling when my fridge looks like this! All stocked and meals prepped for the week. This means I have fruit and veggies all washed, chopped, and placed in stackable tupperware all neat and organized. This way everything is ready to throw together with different meals. Saves me a TON of time at dinner.
Seriously, don't you love looking at something when it's all organized?? Or is it just me? Sometimes I'll just open the fridge just to admire the neatness. No? You don't do this? Hmmm, okay. Moving on.
I like to pre-mix all the dry ingredients of this gluten free pizza crust. Also, I usually BBQ a whole bunch of chicken to have ready to add to different recipes during the week. My favorite is BBQ chicken pizza. YUM!
And like I said, if you take the time to prep all the veggies then this meal is very quick to assemble.
I also like to have these green smoothie bags all ready to throw into the Vitamix. Really saves me a lot of time, plus, I don't have to worry about my spinach going bad. My favorite smoothie recipe is, spinach of course, strawberries, a banana, a little splash of vanilla extract, one lemon slice (with the peel, is SO good for you), some ground flaxseed, cinnamon, and homemade unsweetened kefir. I'll show you how to make kefir someday. I love that my kids are getting all their probiotics. They won't drink my Kombucha.
"I saved the baby food containers, & I prepped both (mine & Ronin's) "chocolate milks" = Isagenix protein shakes on Sun. The night before I prep the shaker, water, "choc milk" & clothes - in the morning... we are out the door!!" -Aimee O'Conner
#5 SIEZE EVERY MINUTE
"Don't waste tiny pockets of time. When I pump gas, I clean out the car. When I am waiting for kids to get in the car from soccer practice, I get some business calls in or something to that effect. There are many, many pockets of time each day that go wasted. I think about what little things I need to get done in the morning and write them on a card that I throw in my pocket or purse. Then when a pocket of time comes up, I pull the card out and get stuff done!!"
"Workout over your lunch hour or with your kids. My office building has a full gym. It is so easy to work through lunch, but working out during my lunch gives me a boost of energy and reassurance that I can get my workout done. When I have a busy day or on the weekends, I get active with my kids. When they are playing soccer, I play with them. When they are riding their bike, I ride with them. When we go swimming, I swim with them. "
Must wake up early! This one has been a
hard one to adapt, but once I finally got used to waking up a couple
hours before the kids, my days go SO much better. It gives me time to do
some personal study and prayer, exercise, then get ready for the day.
#7 CHARTS FOR KIDS
I just LOVE lists and schedules. May be a tad obsessed😬.
Anyway, making these charts has really helped everyone. Things go a lot smoother because now instead of CONSTANTLY telling them every little thing they need to do, ALL day long, now I just say, "go check your chart". There are rewards and consequences. Has made my life easier and now I don't feel like I'm always the mean drill Sargent.
#8 PLAYDATE SWAPS
Do a play date swap with a couple neighborhood friends you know and
trust. I have Brooklyn go to a friends house once or twice a week so I can run
some errands (always easier with less children😜), then I'll put Owen down for a nap and work on a few household chores, and a little #isagenix fun (some call it work, but I think it's fun). Then I will take a turn and have Brooklyn's friends come play at my house for a while on a different day of the week. #9 CRAFT CADDIE AND BUSY BOX
Having this craft caddie all ready to go has really been helpful when I'm busy making dinner or cleaning up. I just pull out some paper and set them up at the counter with the caddie and they are ready to get creative.
These bins are full of busy bag ideas I've created and found on Pinterest.
#10 SET YOUR TIMER
Set your timer. It's easy to get carried
away working on a project, then before you know it, the baby is awake or the kids are home from school and your window of "to do list" time is
over. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
I also like to use a 20 minute list on some days. I just write down all the things I need, want, and SHOULD do, then set my timer and work down the list, giving myself 20 minutes for each task. This method helps my brain I guess you could say. I know I SHOULD be playing with my kids, but then I see messes everywhere and I can't seem to focus on playing. This way, the list is telling my brain, "don't worry, you can get to that in 20 minutes, focus on your kids at this moment". Am I just crazy? Or can anyone relate? "Have
a weekly/daily cleaning task list to break up household chores
throughout the week so that it's not all packed into one day." -Julie Danielson
"We
have designated weeknights of the same dinner during the school year -
every Monday is crockpot chili, Wednesday pasta, and Friday pizza. Oh,
and Thursdays are leftovers. I meal plan (or intend to) every Saturday
or Sunday before I grocery shop (yes
I created a"form" with each dinner's entree, side and salad). I also
use the help of apps for organizing whenever possible. So a future tip:
we all have phones since I work full time. We use the cozi app for our
daily family calendar. I can add each child's activities, and they can
select their own name and see what their schedule is. It also has a
grocery list and anyone in our family can add to it. It's awesome!" -Sally Tantilla #11 PICK OUT OUTFITS FOR THE WEEK
I like to pick out my outfits too☺️. It's not just for the kids.
I found these cute printouts on Pinterest. Isn't it great!!!
#12 VITAMIN ORGANIZERS
This is a great way to stay consistent with having the kids take vitamins. They think it's fun too. I just set them out for them at breakfast time.
#13 MULTIPURPOSE YOUR PURCHASES
"Multi-purpose your purchases. Instead of towels for each bathroom and towels for the pool, we consolidated and got these awesome towels for all purposes. They are super absorbent, never stink, and you can was 15-20 in 1 load! Most everything in our home can be used for a variety of things, so we have much less clutter and we don't spend time looking for a single use product."
"Find out what you like and put it on your schedule of auto-shipment! We save time AND money by having the bulk of our shopping done automatically! This means, no waste and more family time.
Our essentials auto-shipped from Amazon
Our fresh, healthy and easy-to-make dinners from Hello Fresh and Blue Apron. We used to have all of our fresh groceries delivered by Peapod, but it is no longer available in our area. You can just re-select your basics and they are delivered to your front door. No wasted groceries and perfectly picked produce, meats, and all other groceries are delivered right to your kitchen.
Our breakfast shakes are auto-shipped from Isagenix.
My favorite skincare is auto shipped from Rodan + Fields.
My clothes are on auto-ship from Stitch Fix (there are companies that have this for men, children and athletic-wear, too)!"
#13 AMAZON I just LOVE Amazon. I save myself HOURS by shopping online instead of driving all across town searching for different items I need. I'm sure most of you are aware of Amazon prime (free shipping) by now. It's pretty awesome. Throw back to 4 years ago when I did a presentation on BALANCING life as a mom.
I mentioned before that when moving my blog content to a different platform, I lost a lot of my posts. So luckily I was able to find them all and would like to periodically re-post them here again. Although I wrote this one a few years ago when I was pregnant with Brooklyn, it was still a great reminder for me even in my life today.
(Written in 2011)
In my attempt to prepare myself for natural childbirth I’m reading all kinds of books. At the moment I’m reading Painless Childbirth: An Empowering Journey Through Pregnancy and Childbirth. This book can get a little too deep for my liking but I’m still learning a great deal from it. The part that stood out to me the most is when she talks about letting go of negative feelings to better prepare yourself for a painless childbirth. She explains that hypnotherapy can be a great way to get to the root of these unwanted feelings, and how powerful our subconscious mind can be. It’s really helping me analyze my life and release the negative feelings that are causing me a bit of stress.
There are a few things I’m working through right now (in my mind) and one of them has to do with a long lost friend. Someone I became really close to at one point. I haven’t seen or heard from her in over 5 years, and the last time I saw her was when I ran into her at a store. She was very cold and acted as if she didn’t even know me. I knew instantly that something was wrong, this was not the excited bubbly friend I knew. I never saw her upset, and she was always so enthusiastic when ever we got together or talked on the phone. I left the store feeling overwhelmed with sadness and confusion. I didn’t know what happened. I replayed our last conversation over and over in my head, trying to come up with some sort of explanation for the way she acted towards me. I couldn’t figure it out, everything seemed to be fine. We haven’t spoken since that day. I’ve thought about her many times over the years and lost plenty of sleep over it. A couple weeks ago I had this dream I got to see her again and I asked her what upset her so bad. In my dream she still seemed upset and didn’t really give me an answer. I woke up feeling like I should try to find her. I looked her up on Facebook… couldn’t find her. I emailed a mutual friend to ask if she knew where I could find her… no reply. Another week passed and I was still bothered. Then I had another dream, and in this dream I saw her again and we actually talked and everything was good again. I woke up the next morning feeling totally refreshed and at peace with everything, which was amazing! This is exactly what the author of this book talks about. She explains that we can do a lot of healing through our subconscious because many situations in life are completely out of our control. So if we can get our subconscious minds to create the outcome we hoped for then it can make us feel as if it really happened. It can provide tremendous healing and much needed closure.
I remember one summer day as a child, I was out playing with one of my friends. We were enjoying a nice time together until suddenly she punched me right in the gut, knocking the wind out of me. After a moment of panic and complete shock, I caught my breath. I couldn't believe she did this to me!
I asked her, "WHY on earth would you do this?"
"I wanted to see if you would cry", she responded.
I compare this experience to our trials in life. God gave us free agency. The ability to act for ourselves. To CHOOSE! How will we respond to hurtful situations? Will we cry and become bitter? Or will we catch our breath and move forward?
We know that throughout life we are faced with different challenges. We for the most part understand that our purpose here on earth is to pass the test. Will we choose God? Or will be choose to follow our own selfish desires?
Often times I worry too much about what my next trial is going to be? I'm practically EXPECTING to get punched in the gut. But why am I so worried? Why do I fear trials so much?
I should be ready to face them with the "bring it on" attitude. I can handle this? God is with me and he will strengthen me because of it.
If we knew no sadness then we would not know joy.
If we had everything given to us, then we would not appreciate the value of hard work.
If we never had uninterrupted sleep by a screaming baby, then we might not ever appreciate how amazing it is to sleep through the night.
If we never got our hearts broken, then we might not fully appreciate it when we find ourselves a loving and trustworthy man.
If our children never faught with one another, we would not be so dramatically happy when we see them playing nicely together (I think they secretly know this).
Getting punched in the gut, believe it or not, can be a good thing. It might hurt and leave us momentarily out of breath, but it can teach us things. Perhaps to be prepared, be ready to flex when we see the fist coming. Or to understand that the pain and out of breath feeling only lasts for a moment.
In 2 Nephi chapter 2 verses 15-30 of the Book of Mormon teaches us that God's plan is a plan of HAPPINESS. It was designed to be MOSTLY enjoyable.
"Happiness is the object and design of our existence."
Adam fell that men might be, and men are that they might have JOY!
2 Nephi 2:25
I need to stop fearing the future, and trust in God. We can expect to get the wind knocked out of us at times, but we need NOT expect that it will be the END of all joy and happiness. God is always there. He will never give us more than we can handle, and he promises that if we endure to the end, we will be blessed. In other words, our capacity to feel happiness and joy will increase.
Gods plan is utterly sweet and pure perfection. And LOVE is the foundation. He LOVES US! He WANTS us to be happy.
