TWO KINDS OF PEOPLE

I've just learned the way to overcome writers block.  All you have to do is, well, just be an emotional wreck which seems to happen about once a month for me... hmmm, very strange. So, anyway, I'm realizing that the drama queen emotional side of me is what kicks out my best blog posts. It's all about pouring your heart out, and if being on my period is what drives my passion, then so be it. It's about time I find something good about that time of month.  I shall now embrace my womenhood more fully than ever. 

  
Now if I could just get my husband to do the same... :)


There are two kinds of people. What I AM, and what I am NOT.

What I am NOT: I'm not the type of person that hides the way they're feeling very well. I know that this can be a good thing, but also a bad thing. Sometimes it's good not to share EVERYTHING, especially when it's negative. Focusing your energy on the bad things is not going to make life any easier. Learning to find solutions can bring you closer to achieving your goals and overcoming your trials. I heard a quote once by Charles Malik, "A great leader suffers in a hundred different ways and keeps his suffering to himself."
The bad side to always keeping things to yourself is,  you'll never allow others to know how you truly feel, and as a result may never have the opportunity of helping them. Sometimes it's just nice to hear someone say, "oh yes, I've been there" or "I feel the SAME way". 
What I AM: I am the type of person that is VERY open and will share every detail about the way I'm feeling. Some people may not like this because they'd rather just hear the good. I like to vent, I feel so much better when I can just get my feelings out. And sometimes it's not even venting, it's just being honest about the way things are. Life can be hard, we all know that, but why not open up a little and allow others to relate and know that what they are feeling is normal and okay. I always appreciate it when people are open, it allows me to feel a little LESS crazy :).  Writing and talking about your thoughts and feelings can bring clarity to problems, and perhaps helping you figure out what's really bothering you.
Let me give you an example here, which happens to be from my mission once again. The reason why I refer to my mission so much is because I learned ALOT of important life lessons within that period of time. Okay so, I had a companion that was great in every way. She seemed to be perfect, everyone I ever met who knew her had nothing but good things to say about her. We got along great except I always felt like there was something wrong with me for struggling so much.  I was tired, homesick, discouraged, overwhelmed, and just felt completely inadequate.  So, when I tried telling her the way I was feeling, I noticed that she was getting annoyed with me. She then said something that I'll never forget, "gosh, do you just hate your mission or something?"
 I didn't know what to say, but I do know that when she said that to me, it made me feel even worse. I thought, wow, I must be such a bad missionary if I'm having these feelings, especially since it was obvious she could not relate.  In her opinion I was just dwelling on the negative and she was sick of hearing it. In my opinion, all I needed to hear was, "oh, I know it can be hard, I've felt the same way, but you're doing great, it just takes some time, you can do this, I'll help you, being so far away from home can be rough, and the language is overwhelming, but I promise, you'll get it".  
So the moral of the story is, there are two kinds of people and sometimes those two people don't always mesh well, but it doesn't make either one of them wrong. Some people are great examples of living a positive life, and the others are good at opening up which can be helpful to those who are dealing with the same issues.

26 comments:

Kristina P. said...

I really liked this post, Crystal. I totally agree. I really try to have and maintain a positive attitude. I vent to my girlfriends, not on my blog. :)

Fashion Butter said...

I def. keep things to myself and I have realized although it may cut down on the drama in my life, it is not healthy for me. I am working on opening up a bit more!

Great post, girl! X

nmaha said...

I agree, having both kinds of people is what makes life interesting.

FourJedis said...

It's definitely good we aren't all the same, but that makes it even more important for people to keep lines of communication open. We can't all read each other's minds. :)

I'm sure I vent on my blog.

Shell said...

You are my type of people. :)

My Personal Journey said...

I think everyone struggles with this at some point in their life. Thank you for bringing it to light & reminding us that it is okay that everyone needs encouragement from time to to time. ;)

alexis said...

i vent everywhere. blog, friends, husband, strangers...whoever will listen. but i love my friends who don't vent, too. if i had been your mission companion i would have totally told you what you needed to hear. :)

Addison AND Crews Mama said...

This was such a great post and something I definately needed to hear! It reminded me not to be so negative about things, I do that sometimes and definately need to be better. Thank you for the great post! :)

Sara @ Domestically Challenged said...

I wish i vented more, but I am learning!!

NIKOL said...

I really like this post, too. Some people just need to vent! You know that book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus book? It talks about how for some women just the very act of talking about their feelings and problems helps to resolve them. I know that's often how it is for me.

Daisygirl said...

ya this will never happen for the guys! I am a talker...maybe too much! I say what is on my mind and exactly how I am feeling. It is hard to find people that are the same way. Sometimes I bring up a subject and I hear gasps..."did she really just ask that?"
Love this post!

LambAround said...

Greetings from Lamb! Thank you for stopping by to show me some bloggy love. It was quite a shock to wake up and discover that I’d been featured on SITS, especially with my face covered in sticky cinnamon! Now I have lots of fun new blogs to explore. If you do try out my face mask, be sure to take a photo and email it to me. I’ll feature you in a post with a link to your blog :)

LambAround’s latest post: My Awkward Family Photo

*LLUVIA* said...

Good post! I totally agree! I'm not the kind of person that keeps things bottled up! I speak up when I'm not happy about something.

He & Me + 3 said...

I keep them bottled up until they just burst out. Not good. I wish I would talk more when something bothers me...then hold it in until I just can't anymore.

Carrie said...

You are just lovely all around. I love your genuineness and sincerity. You are a dear friend of mine. I love the law of attraction, the other night you were all diva mom and I was all soccer mom. :) Let's watch The Bachelorette soon!

A Lil Story said...

We should always try to comfort someone who is struggling, even if we aren't feeling the same way. That really stinks that your friend couldn't at least offer a hug or some encouragement to you!

I definitely keep my feelings in way too often, but my blog has been a good way for me to get some feelings out without actually having to "talk" about them =)

Michelle said...

There are some things that we just cannot hold in or they will manifest themselves in other ways. It's just not healthy to keep everything bottled up. We've got to be true to ourselves - if we're not, one day we may just get a healthy dose of reality, and end up with a body that's sick. Hiding our feelings can make us physically sick, and who wants that?

Peace. ;)

JDaniel4's Mom said...

I am glad you are who you are. Thanks for stopping by.

Lindsay said...

Great post!!! I love a good vent :)

Lilibeth MacLean said...

Crystal, even when you vent, you manage to put everything in a positive light. You are a ray of sunshine.

Carey said...

Here from SITS!

Love your blog and all you have to say. Definitely will be coming back.

New follower! :)

Debbie said...

I think a positive outlook is so important. Some days it is almost impossible - but most days we can do it!

Sally said...

I find myself holding things in, yet at the same time, trying to find a way to express what I'm feeling without hurting someone else's feelings.

Sure did need to read this today! Thank you!!

Karla @ {The Classy Woman} said...

I think it's so wonderful when people can be transparent. That is the very thing that makes others feel comfortable and able to relate. Judging them or making mean comments is not at all helpful.

I'm definitely not the type to keep things bottled up. I like to address an issue and work through it if necessary and then move on. It feels great to get it off my chest so I don't have to dwell on it or feel uncomfortable with someone later on.

I'm somewhat of a private person so in terms of venting, I generally share with my closest girlfriends or my hubby vs. my blog but I do enjoy reading other's posts on exactly how they feel and what they are going through and admire their ability to share with everyone.

I always love your posts Crystal, spoken from the heart which is the reason why I follow your blog. :)

Huckdoll said...

I hear you loud and clear. That's the great thing about blogging - if you choose to vent here there are so many people willing to listen and offer what you need to hear/want you want to hear and sometimes what you don't want to hear. You draw your lines and boundaries, stay within them and this blogging thing can be an awesome form of therapy. Before I started a health blog I had a personal blog and for years my readers helped me through a lot just by listening :)

Kristi {at} Live and Love...Out Loud said...

Great post Crystal! I have a friend who's a lot like you. She's honest about her feelings, doesn't mask it with the standard "life is great" response. I really love that about her. Not only is she open and honest and real, but I always know where I stand with her. She's been a source of comfort, encouragement and an amazing friend. I wouldn't be surprised if someone out there feels the same way about you. Stay true to who you are. :)
Thanks for stopping by. Have a fabulous day.

Kristi, Live and Love...Out Loud
@TweetingMama

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