Discovering Who We Are

This is the time of year we get to celebrate all the Pisces out there, myself included. Wahoo! Can't believe I'm going to be 35, WHAT???? When did this happen? Well as I mentioned on Periscope a couple days ago, I just realized that I achieved a goal I set for myself. About 5 years ago I announced here on the blog that I wanted to write a book before I turned 35. Well guess what!? I wrote a book!!!!

Okay, well it's not exactly the kind of book I had in mind but I decided to make it count anyway. I made a little instruction manual on how to make fermented foods and also about sprouting and cleansing. So I was pretty excited when I figured out how to do this AND how to make it available on Amazon. If you have a book on Amazon you officially gain the title of "Published author" right? Well if you disagree then please don't burst my bubble. I like feeling all smart and sophisticated.

So the book is $5 free shipping for prime members, but trust me, I aint gettin rich off this.  I think I get like less than $1 for each book sold, but that's okay. My purpose in writing a book is not to make money. I'm just trying to share what I know in hopes to help others.  The process of self discovery and how we can help others do the same provides great fulfillment in life.

So now let's talk about the Pisces horoscope. It's funny, because everything that my horoscope told me, seemed to be VERY comforting, and in fact answered many of my questions.

My NEEDS as a Pisces, is: A purpose, so as to focus thoughts and avert boredom. Quiet intervals, to foster a sense of identity and peace. To feel ENCOURAGED, trusted and loved. Pisces needs to stick to a schedule or they'll get lost in their own dreams. Too much regimentation, however, will crush their creativity.

I mean seriously! This is exactly what I've been struggling with lately. Being TOO regimented and not allowing God and creativity into my life. I was just too busy following my schedule. So a few months ago I threw out my "to do" lists and schedules was so liberating. But then I just craved ROUTINE. So now I'm just trying to find the balance between routines and "fly by the seat of my pants". Ugh, it's that word again, BALANCE... the unattainable goal. One day y'all... I'm gonna find that balance I so desperately need in my life.

Horoscopes and patriarchal blessings are very interesting. If you choose to believe them, it unwraps the truth about ones self, and in a sense, setting us free to do MORE with the gifts/ talents we've been given. It enhances faith in our own abilities, giving us the reassurance that, YES, we are special, and even GOOD at certain things. It gives us affirmations of what we can ultimately become, and perhaps unveiling the hidden obstacles holding us back.

I laughed when I read in my horoscope that I NEED to feel encouraged :) I've noticed that about myself and I believe it's a weakness. It holds me back a little in life, provoking me to second guess myself A LOT!  I remember when I first started telling people I wanted to serve an LDS Mission. People literally laughed, thinking I was joking.  This caused me to really doubt my abilities and think maybe I was fooling myself at thinking I could ACTUALLY do something like this. I knew I had to rise above the negative comments and go forth with my endeavor. It's not easy for me to ignore the nay sayers, or my own self doubts, but I know it's the only way to succeed.

I think it's human nature to compare ourselves with others, and in so doing, we tend to compare our weaknesses with others strengths. Why not be happy with who we are and what we have been given? I ask myself this all the time. It's hard to always be aware of the unique abilities we each have, and not be jealous of others gifts. I'm always doing this to myself, not realizing at the moment the harm it's doing to my self confidence. I read other blogs and I'm completely blown away by the talent these other women have. I can't help but feel less as a person and completely inadequate in every way. Comparing yourself to others is guaranteed to bring you down and make you feel worthless, therefore leading you in the opposite direction of finding true fulfillment in life.

In a world that's ever changing and clocks that seem to be going 100 miles a minute, it's hard for us to take time to relax and enjoy the little things. Maybe I should just speak for myself. I'm constantly trying to remind myself to slow down and relax a little, always feel like there's something more I should be doing,  like there is never enough time in a day to accomplish it all. I'm reminded of the quote by President Ezra Taft Benson, "When we put God first, all other things fall into place."

 I know I'm in the season of motherhood and that in and of itself is something to be grateful for and proud of. I also believe very strongly that it's so important for us mothers to have other hobbies that don't include wiping bums and cleaning up messes. It's important for us to set aside time for ourselves to refine our minds and develop talents.

"Water cannot be drawn from an empty well, and if you are not setting aside a little time for what replenishes you, you will have less and less to give to others, even to your children."
-Elder M. Russell Ballard 

I want to try harder to fulfill my purpose by allowing the truth to set me free, rising above the negativity, quit comparing myself to others, and hurry less in my season of motherhood.


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